Love(?) Letters for My Imaginary Darling

-  I heard from you today that you would not walk through fire with me you would not come and go in to , or take me out of - the fire but - you would dream of me about the fire we make in each other. My Pefect Sweet Imaginary Darling Schatz sds is not a security paper or a drilling machine. s d s is you. Sweet DarlingSchatz who will rather watch from far, dream in secret and kiss only in hiding.

Walk Through Fire. Writing to you, my darling. Then I delete most from your letter, because you will not have time to read, - and paste them here. Writing for you. Another disguised message to my imaginary darling. 28.04.2020 So I hope this message is safe. Hi. .  I do not know where you are. But I know that you are here. - with me. I feel you . . here with me. It is now exactly four weeks since we talked. That day was very sweet.. and heartbreaking. I still go in my mind over all that we talked. How we looked in to our eyes again - it was heartbreaking - somehow. And I have not been eating or sleeping much since that day. There is something so big missing from the day and night... I wonder if you are well. I wonder when can we talk again. I wonder if you are with me, if I am with you. I wonder why you cannot write to me. There are twenty emails about system error, which you need to clean. The error really scares me. I am usually steady, but this error in em...

Do you realize ..!  DarlingSchatz my Imaginary Sweetheart, Each day we are a mere five minutes away from doing something that would make us feel as if we are in heaven - you and me. Each day. Just five minutes away from heaven. It is just a five-minute-step to do it, get it done, to get to heaven... We could take that step - five-minutes - today. Then again five-minutes tomorrow, .. We would be getting closer to heaven - with each passing day. But, When we avoid taking that five minute-step towards heaven today, when we don't take that little step which needs only five minutes today, we would not reach there. We would still be here. We would not reach closer to it today . . . then we avoid it again , tomorrow. Just this five minutes tomorrow, And day after tomorrow . and the day after .. when we keep avoiding it. when we keep not taking that step, day after day after day, then .. we will not reach that heaven, Darling. We will end up in a place where the "end...

Not only imaginary.  Sweet Darling Schatz, I want to think of you Without tears in my eyes. I want to feel my cheeks Fill up with a smile When you come to my mind. So please Send me a word Say you are mine And then I will laugh So happily That my heart will Reach the sky. Redeem me from my tears, And be my Salvation, Just tell me where you are My sweet imaginary darling, Say that you are there! Save me. Save - us, you and me From this deep oblivion Divided by borderless skies. The sky has No border, We should just fly over Darling, Our destiny Is for ours to take into our hands And we Should Make Of it What we want. What we want! Do you want me? Take me, take our destiny in your hands,. Take my hand, Save me, Save your heart, Save that precious Feeling in our hearts! Please salvage our love And redeem us from this hurting! I want to think of you With a smile in my eyes, Knowing that you will come And kiss me in the night...

I think of you Every night At the time When we send each other 22 million kisses Thoughts, 22 Billions Weight of memories 22 tons Butterflies you give me Each time you come Into my thoughts In my dreams : 22 trillions . My love for you : Endless. I miss you, Darlingschatz. Come to me, Every night,. Kiss me, each morning Until my breath stops,. Until my heart stops Beating You are alive In Me. I love you.

"Shooting Stars" by Rival Sons In the woods version: ... Listen >>  the other version: ... Listen >>  My love is stronger than yours It's stronger than yours It's stronger than yours My love is stronger than your Hate will ever be And my faith is deeper than yours It's deeper than yours It's deeper than yours My faith is deeper than your Doubt will ever be We move through the world Like shooting stars across the sky Splitting through the darkness Putting the light into their eyes My laughter is louder than yours It's louder than yours It's louder than yours My laughter is louder than your Shouting will ever be And my dancing is better than yours It's better than yours It's better than yours My dancing is better than your Marching will ever be We move through the world Like shooting stars across the sky Splitting through the darkness Putting the light into their eyes We move through the ...

One day after another, I am throwing my life away. For nothing For nothing at all. Music for My (aching) Heart   to Soothe My Soul  Playlists on Spotify > Falling in Love  Oh. this one too. Float with this naughty list. I went to the river with this one, walking and running . . Did not know three hours passed. Playlist: Falling In Love 🦋 i m givin' you all my love💛 In Exchange for Nothing! 🌹cigarettes after sex list "touch me with your kiss. feel me on your lips. i m giving you all my love.. 21.4.20 last night you were close to me in that house by the ocean. i heard the waves and i heard you say. all that i wanted was to be yours.. falling in love. i m falling in love. with  you..deeper than i ve felt it before." ... Listen >>  Walk Through Fire.  Walk Through Fire 💘 ⚡ Did we take too many chances ⚡ or did we let too many pass us? ⚡  ⚡ What about the mess we made?? I am walking through fire. Many tear...

Darling It's not that hard for you to find a five minute space of private time within one week, isn't it? Within those (rare?) five minute: You could write to me, send a message, give me a sign, tell me that you are alive, that I was in your thoughts, then delete the message, too. Not Hard?  It's not that hard to do, is it? But if it's still not done.. what does it mean... You do not take proactive action to five minutes to tell me something from you, from 02 April until today, 25 April. Fifteen weekdays, three full weekends. You do not do that. What does that mean? It is not that hard to find the five minutes for yourself, is it? You clicked two from the ten or so the "reply" and "contact us" buttons in the disguise mails. Then .. five words + four words. You took time for that. Is that a lot of effort according to your opinion. Taking five minutes each week from the 168 hours in the week... it is not that hard, is it? Hard?  Or ...

Are You With Me! My sweet Imaginary DarlingSchatz, you said you are with me. "gedänklich bin ich bei dir." Are you with me? Are you with me. Give me a sign! Torture. it is torture! sweet torture.. what you bring. it is also a song by my BF. you. hear this song. that is what I want to shout now. Torture  by Rival Sons on Spotify  ..Listen >> Torture . Live!! by Rival Sons - Tenement TV .. Watch >> Are You With Me?  .. the song. I get carried away each time I see or hear this song...! that time in mexico with you.. are you, are you are you not missing that time in mexico with me.. Are You With Me  by Lost Frequencies Original acoustic by Easton Corbin. It is beautiful. Heartbreaking. Seeing the video. Darling, Let us switch the hair colours? - that will be you and me. We kiss. You stay on earth. I travel away, far, to another planet with that rocket. . . I cannot come back . because my rocket ha...

The Four Words from You. Today I heard four words from you again. I am happy. All in all, I wonder at myself, why I have not left you. That is not like me to still be with you, after .... the seperation at the car, after ... your silence, .... after ... the first message you sent saying we must now stop us - be without each other, and we must learn by ourselves how to live - you learn to live life with Al, I with Bo., .... and then after .. your second message saying it is dangerous to send whatsapp and sms. After the day in the car, you left.... and then how you refused to come, see, hear, talk, call, or even send a message ..... in the next five days . how you did not drive that 5 minutes from your office to my place ... although I had travelled 9 hours to be there next to your place.. how you did not even lift the phone to dial my number - although I had given you three numbers anonymous for security reasons and was waiting 5 days 120 hours for your message. So I travel 18 h...

Parts from Today and from the Past. My Dear Imaginary SchatzDarling, I found a part of a letter from the past. It was 18th December 2019. I could still write to you a normal letter in a normal format. This is what I have written to you, perhaps I have sent it to you. In to your bottomless abiss of deleted messages. See if you remember this text? - Part 1. Part from the Far Past. Imaginary Letter to My Imaginary Darling  18.12.2019 Hallo Imaginary Darling, Heute habe ich dich sehr früh gelesen. Es war schön... um 3 Uhr bist du aufgestanden? Jetzt weiß ich, wovon ich träumen würde, . . träumen darf / kann / will / möchte / sollte... ? Wie sagt man auf Deutsch "now I know what I should be dreaming about" Was normalerweise passiert ist so: ich schreibe dir tausend Worte. Du schreibst mir zwanzig und sendest mir einen Kuss. Dann rufst du mich an und fragt, was gibt's neues, was kannst du mir erzählen . . ? Es steht da, schriftlich, auf deiner Hand,...

Yesterday and today I have writtten you some disguised messages. Darlingschatz, I deleted parts of them because I was - I am - afraid that someone else will be reading them, when you are asleep. You are imaginary, I know. I still would like to be careful, even in this, our imaginary world. So, this is what I wrote and deleted... From the balance (rest) of the messages which I sent, I do not know if you could figure out what I was meaning to say, Part Message deleted to my imaginary DarlingSchatz (1) on 20.04.2020 In the life as riders, the level of satisfaction in personal and professional sides keep us happy or make us sad. What about you? From your side (as a rider) - do you have the feeling that you are content, that you get all what you want now in the day to day to be happy? From my (networking) side, I am not sure if it is satisfactory to keep everything for a later date because the seasons are turning and the clock is ticking. We do not live forever. Our next quest...

When Bo says these things, does Bo feel that there is some unspoken pain inside me? Does it show in my reaction - well... I do not react except look at Bo, and smile - I think. A kind of a smile? I hope. Does Bo sense, there is some unconnected receiver inside me, which does not get it? Or does he want to convince me, that I am worth it, that I am not as worthless or hopeless or powerless as I feel myself these days.?.. That I should not be feeling so.... as I feel? Is that why he feels the need to say these things, to convince me? To show what he thinks? To express himself, more than he usually does? Or,... is he so smart and sees through me? And knows that he has to give extra effort to get me back... from wherever I am now??! Quote. Action, saying : "You are a very strong and beautiful person, you know?" Reaction : (Shake head) 'no' as reply, to show that I do not know. "You don't know? Why?." smile. "That's why I have to te...

The Nothing (Part 2) . The Pain ? (Part 3) I am full of the Nothing which you give to me, so that no one else and nothing else can come to me, touch me through this void. It's inevitable love. You electrify my blood Stop wasting what we've got. [Chorus] You know I need you forever And I know we said we could never But tell me that it hurts To be that lonely girl We must be together We must be together My Addiction Listen @ spotify >> ... My Addiction  (my addiction / adam french) Up all night I can pretend Try to fight but in the end Nothing's making any sense. I started something I can't quit Can't talk myself out of it How do I get over this? [Pre-Chorus] I remember you calling my name I remember and I want you again! I remember you walking away I'm alone now and I can't take the pain [Chorus] You know I need you forever I know we said we could never But tell me that it hurts To be that lonely girl Why...

Darling, I Am Full of That Nothing which you left me with. What is the use of saying so many nice things, when the only effect is has is to bring more pain? He says nice things, it brings pain, he senses that there is pain so he tells more nice things, and it brings more pain... The cycle. The (vicious? sad?) cycle.. of action and reaction, Trying to reach a heart... Lost Inside a vacuum void Full of the Nothingness Which I am Inside my shell Full of the Nothing Which you have said to me, given to me, shown to me, Except that excruciatingly sweet promise of "I am with you, be sure you are with me" You said to me .. "all the time even if you do not hear a word from me, get a sign from me, I am with you." Darling. You live in me. I have no sign, darling..,  For long days and long, long nights .. I have no word from you - jsut five little words - and my heart is flying ................. And I am With you With all my heart and all of my ...

Love Quotes. = Pain.? "You are the very very very important person in my whole life " - no, it was not you who said it to me. "How can I make you understand, that I love you very very much!? " No, that wasn't you either, who said that to me today. You know who. DarlingSchatz, my imaginary darling, please tell me. What can I do. What should I do. Will you tell me to go, Will you tell me, that you do not love me anymore,. Can you say.. "please go." Can you let me go... Darling even if you did let me go, can I -..? Can I let you go? Last month, oh, was it even the month before last, I thought for sure that you have left me for life. Even then, my heart has kept you.. You left me, but You did not leave my heart... You were there.. And then, You came and wrote to me "I am with you. Darling Schatz, weil you ever let me go and leave you? Love Quotes from someone else... bring only pain. ... I do not know how long ...

I have been sending 25 variously disguised messages to you in the last five days. At least 25 messages in various forms. Hundreds hours? Sleepless, making thoughts how to get to hear you safely, 50 waking hours. 168 hours dreaming of you... Burning for you, igniting my heart like a wildfire that you do not talk, write, say,.. anything. That I cannot get to you, to ask you, are we safe.. Agonising like fire, sleeping no hours, eating no ounce of food,, existing.. Only existing on air and the few drops of coffee or tears that come to my face.. That was my week. Thousands of words in sent in your direction. Hoping, hoping, oh so much hoping for that miracle... Believing in fairies and those thousand butterflies in my tummy _ to take you to me. And... the miracle happens! Today! I hear you, twice. Hear from you three or five words,... and I am flying in the highest and sweetest of those seven heavens.. I am floating... After thousands words to you, I get five words from you, On y...

Darling mein Schatz, Today is 16.4.2020 I was trying to write to you . . . Could not. Then I found this from 6.2.2020 I am afraid, that something happened which makes even our last contact possibility impossible. There was an open email at 4 am one day. Then . . . I was afraid to write. Today I sent one - just 1 single mail - and - that mail was opened again. I am scared. Something must have happened. You are silent. You said "I am with you" - even if I do not hear anything. Is it so hard to write? May be it is? I am scared to write again. I write here, again - my eternal truth . . . my eternal truths. See it? hear it? feel me? -- please feel my heart. it does not beat light without you! I miss you. My eyes only see you through the tears each time I breathe, it halts in my throat with this knot. I need to hear from you . . . I tried so much . I tried so many days . .  . I cannot tell this to you - the only thing I wish to say to you . . . My eternal truths _ feel m...

DarlingSchatz, Are you prepared to live the rest of your life without seeing me ever again? Please write Your answer here : .................. .. xx

Distraction Solutions.  Sweet DarlingSchatz, This is how I did it. (First I should explain : contrary to what you assumed, I was alone for majority of the four-day Easter holidays. Why? They closed the border, remember? We took the safer option, and decided to move to different sides of the border. Yes, I was alone mostly. I had hours to write to you , to think of you .. It was hard not to.) So this was my distraction solution: Day 1. Three four hours on mountain bike, on that paved road which goes from my house to yours. I stayed, stopped in front of the house where you used to live... breathed the air.. and reminisced.. how it was, how it would have been, if you had still lived under that roof. That big blue sofa, where you kissed me, in that one mid-morning hour ... the window room, where you pulled the blinds close before you... continued. The grassy slope where you landed, the shed, where I was watching you, after the evening at your peak-forest, where we made lo...

Can you imagine your future life, without seeing me, even for one single time? Can you? I cannot imagine my life without you. I told you that sentence, exactly as it is written here, in your language, in your car that day. Yes. It still remains true. I cannot also imagine, living without sharing these thoughts with you... Trying not to write to you, the whole day trying to distract myself, so that I will Not be tempted to write that message to you..! I am so glad to have this imaginary blog, where I write my non-thoughts to you, my non-lover.. 💛 The heart is yellow.. Just like on those thousand messages which we sent to each other - - before we uttered that.. one special word. Who we knew we could not take back, once we said it! Oh darling. I know you took that time, chose that time perfectly, to say it to me.. That changed our lives .. I could not say it back to you,... until that fateful day. I know you were waiting to hear that word from me.. days, one whole...

Darling Sweetschatz, I miss you. I am trying to watch a movie. French. Something about a gifted pianist, almost delinquent. He breaks into a house for burglary with friends, sees a piano, forgets the burglary and starts playing. The cops are coming.. I am missing you... Thinking, what we would be doing if you sit next to me, on the sofa, this minute.. It's 22:22 hrs. At night. Our time for 22 million kisses.. I send you all my kisses... mentally. Miss you, my darling Schatz!

Where is that delicious morning Easter Kiss?  Eggspect miracles? <3 <3 <3 Dear Darlingschatz, It is the Easter Sunday. In a normal life, I would have called you, sent you an Easter Kiss, an Easter Card or better still - given you a real Easter kiss on your lips. You would not have waited until I give you a kiss, on a normal Easter Sunday in a normal life. You would have woken me up, given me a real Easter Kiss on my lips and made that sweet Easter Sunday love to me... before I even could utter your name properly.. you would have come inside me. I think. As you have done on those few rare times we were blessed enough to share the same pillow when we woke up in the morning. Now let us dream about it. Do we dream? Do you still dream about those nights, mornings and days? I do. That would have been a normal Easter Sunday on a normal life with a normal couple. So . . . with all these things happening between you and me - what is normal, that is happening? Is th...